Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey

1) In my recent Word Twist game with Melissa, we both found the Big Word. She found SISTER, and I found RESIST. Neither of us found the other one's word. Think about that for awhile.

2) Two nights ago I was telling my mom and Mark about a teacher-student conference I overheard some time back in which I thought the teacher wasn't giving the most useful critique. He was zooming in on a lot of grammar errors, but at the same time saying there were larger, "global" problems with the paper while not giving much guidance as to how to address them. (It's hard; I know.)

Suddenly my mom piped in, "That is exactly like this time when I was a girl and was fired from my job at the library because my boss thought my friend was wearing a clown suit! Really, though, my boss was just anti-Semitic."

But... IS it like that? In any way? This should really make you think. Deeply.

I think we worked something out

We have talked and come up with some ideas for getting along better. I think it's okay now. My feelings are all bruised, though. Sensitive me.

Ugh

Well, it looks like I might be taking a break from my family of origin for awhile... my mother is here and things are bad and I don't think I can continue this arrangement anymore (where she comes once a week and we pay her from our child care stipend USF gives us). The comments she made are definitely out of line; she told me she "doesn't understand why people in their thirties are so tired all the time" (that would be Mark and I) and that she feels as if all the hard work she does for us just "isn't paying off"--that she "isn't seeing any progress." Like we are some kind of charity she's invested her money in, but now she needs to reconsider her investment, given how little progress we've made! These criticisms were also embedded in other criticisms of me and the messiness of my house (which also plagues me, but I seem to have a hard time keeping up with it).

All these remarks were made pretty much within ten minutes of walking in the door. She arrived after having been away a week, and during that week all three of us have been sick. Nevertheless, we have still both gone to our jobs, graded papers, prepared classes, taken care of Daisy, cooked meals, done loads of laundry, and averaged 5 or 6 hours of sleep a night. But she can't understand why people in their 30s would be so tired.

I am starting to think that part of the problem (though it doesn't entirely explain the nastiness and ugliness of her remarks) is that we have this arrangment where we pay her. Hence, her role is truly unclear. Is she somehow our employee, so that when she's here we can expect her to take care of Daisy while we do other things? (Not things for pleasure, mind you-- I mean, catch up on laundry and dishes, run errands, and work on my schoolwork.) Or is she here more in the capacity of grandmother, someone who enjoys time with her grandchild and wants to be doing this, rather than doing it for earnings? It is all somewhat blurred and confusing. I think somehow that this confusion of roles might be making her nastiness more possible.